Being in the middle is a hard place to be, I don’t enjoy the middle seat of an airplane; no place to put my arms. The middle of a conflict is difficult too; especially if it involves relationships. The middle sibling… I can’t relate to that place, but I have observed it as a parent. The middle child can get lost in the shuffle. Brad and I talked often about Ty and whether he would feel neglected with so much of my energy going toward Bryson’s medical needs and then having a younger child that always needs more help. We also discussed the thought of Ty being the middle child but because of Bryson’s needs, he was in the position of the first born. Would these roles make it more difficult for Ty as he matures? Then you throw in the “sibling to a special needs brother” role and “I’m no longer the only middle brother” but I am sharing the middle role with my new adoptive brother.
I was looking through my old writings yesterday and I found the following written on October 4, 2009
The other night, Tyrell brought home a slip of paper from school about a cross county run for the elementary kids at Fairfield High School. This is a chance for elementary kids to get a taste of running one mile with the high school coaches. As he handed me the paper, Ty said “mom, I want to run this race with Bryson. The top 10 get medals and everyone gets a ribbon.” I thought this was cool that Ty wanted to run with his brother, but I thought to myself, “does Ty understand Bryson’s limitations?” I commented back to him that we should see if Trent and Tucker want to participate. Ty responded back quickly with “why not just with Bryson?” I thought I had stated the obvious to Ty by reminding him that Bryson would have a hard time running and finishing. Ty answered “that is ok, I don’t have to get a medal, and we would still get a ribbon.” Sacrifice and love all came gushing out of my sweet sensitive 9-year-old son. He was willing to sacrifice a chance at a medal to run with his brother. Ty’s heart wanted to see his brother succeed. I think that Ty understands the fact that it really isn’t about winning, it is all about participating and finishing the race.
Reading this brought tears and I thought about my laid back, sensitive and caring middle son who doesn’t like being in the spotlight, doesn’t ask for many things and who at the age of 9 already understood what is truly important in life. Ty has lived his life as a middle brother to Bryson with genuine care and love. He welcomed his adoptive middle brother to the family with grace and kindness. These same qualities he gives to all those who call him family and friend. Wherever he goes young kids love him. He will go the extra mile for a friend in need. A man of few words but when he does speak, listen to him….they are solid, good and life giving words.
Thanks Ty, it is my blessing and honor to be your mom!
Lisa, I love that guy!! Such a good heart!🥰
This brought tears. What a special brother and son!❤️
This is so beautiful. He was so sweet and caring from the start. I remember him being like this at 2 years old! Such a sunny and caring child!