Yesterday afternoon, Brad and I arrived in the desert. We came to see Bryson, grab some sunshine and Brad to attend a Winnipeg Jets Hockey game against the Arizona Coyotes. Bryson sees his new neurologist next week and so that was my “excuse” that I needed to be here. Melissa, Bryson’s ADH provider could easily have attended the appointment with Bryson. She has done a great job of navigating all of Bryson’s medical needs in the 5 months that Bryson has lived with them, I am very grateful.
During the airplane ride yesterday, after I finished reading one of my Christian suspense novels, I pulled up my photos and started browsing through them. Those who know me well, know that I am crazy about pictures. I love to look back and reflect on the memories that were made.
The earliest picture I have on my phone is a picture of Kaden and his cousin Jake from 2006, when Kaden was 3 years old. It’s priceless to me! I went to the beginning of my album and started scrolling. I stopped on a picture from January 2016, I studied it and then I had an incredible moment. I had four pictures on my phone of the Four Peaks Mountain range. Those who have been following my story this last year, know that that I could see the Four Peaks out my RV window last fall and they became a symbol of peace, hope to me. Here I was looking at them from 2016.
My mind started recalling memories from these photos… Stevan had finally arrived home from Jamaica in July 2015. We decided to take our first complete family vacation to the Phoenix area for Christmas. My mom and my brother’s family traveled with us, as well as Brad’s brother and family came down from Manitoba to join us. As memories flowed, I recalled how difficult of a place I was at mentally and emotionally. I had just walked through a hard 2-year adoption process of getting Stevan home. My faith in God was at an all-time low. The 5 months since Stevan had come home… had been not what I had expected, desired. The adjustment of another son and Stevan’s adjustment to his forever family had been hard… excruciatingly hard.
Here we were on vacation, all together, making memories. As I scrolled through other pictures from that trip, we did many fun activities and made good memories. One of the activities was taking an ATV tour through the desert. We had several SXS, and the kids were on four-wheelers. We had a tour guide and I remember how incredible it was to see the desert from a different viewpoint. Every time we made a stop, I was out of the machine taking pictures. The main feature of my landscape photos was the Four Peaks. I did not have any idea what the mountains were called. I only discovered their name several weeks after living here last year when we went on a boat cruise on Saguaro Lake and the tour guide pointed them out.
As I sat on the plane, I tapped Brad on the shoulder and showed him the pictures. I was in awe and amazed that I had these incredible pictures of them from 8 years before. My mind started composing this post, because I saw and felt God in that moment on the plane. God revealed to me His creative way of how He loves me.
The beauty of nature has always brought me peace. The first time I photographed the Four Peaks, I had just answered God’s call and brought home Stevan. I believe taking those pictures on that ATV ride was a sliver of hope and peace to my troubled heart. When I saw the Four Peaks 7 years later, as I was preparing to let go of my oldest son, God knew I needed a window facing them to bring me peace and hope again. He knew, He knew that I would be making this connection this weekend and my faith would be renewed, my hope in the beauty of God and His ways would be refreshed.
Though the mountains be shaken and the hills be removed,
yet my unfailing love for you will not be shaken nor my covenant of peace be removed,”
says the Lord, who has compassion on you. Isaiah 54:10
Friends, in the midst of following God’s call; in the midst of situations of letting go of dreams, friends, expectations; in the midst of grief and sadness, look around you, maybe it won’t be clear right away, but keep looking. I know it’s there, because I KNOW that God is in the business of bringing hope and peace to His Children in unexpected ways. Don’t stop looking!! Maybe take a scroll through the photos on your phone, maybe He has a surprise waiting for you, revealing to you that HE is near!
Lisa, this is awesome. We have a loving Father who cares so deeply about all our emotions and worries!