Victory

The past week, I checked everyday on the social security website to see if the needed changes had been made to get confirmation of Bryson’s AZ residency.  NOTHING….

I had researched earlier about getting his Arizona ID but knew again I had to have several pieces of proof that he is living in AZ. We finally reached our 30 days of being here and I received one piece of mail that I could use. In my research I found an affidavit that I could fill out as a second proof.  I made the decision yesterday…. We are going to get this done!!

Those who know me well, know that I deal with anxiety on a large scale and as much as I was praying and turning it over to Jesus last night, I was restless and anxious.  I have been struggling with sleeping since I have been here.  Last night thankfully felt like a well-rested night.

This morning I woke up early and wanted to just stay in bed…. Today is the 2^nd day that it has rained since we have been here. It is chilly, rainy, and gloomy…. Reminds me of a place I left 33 days ago. Cloudy days are hard for me. But I decided today we are marching ahead. 

We got ready and then I texted my amazing prayer warriors with a request to pray.  This was my text – I could use your prayers this morning. I have been fighting to get some paperwork for Bryson to get his benefits in Arizona. I’m heading out soon to try a different way to get what I need. I need my prayer warriors. While brushing my teeth the song “ I’m going to see a victory .. the battle belongs to the Lord” came to my mind….will you fight with me! ❤️❤️

My phone started dinging and dinging… and I laid my head down on my desk and wept. Everything came to the surface, all my bottled up emotions of this process and the outpouring of support and prayers.  As Bryson came out of the bathroom, I wiped my tears and Bryson said “mom, your phone is going nuts” I responded with “that’s God’s prayer warriors in action!”

We headed out and my stomach was in knots, we were listening to the Message on Sirius XM and the first song that came on was By Faith recorded by 7eventh Time Down, these lyrics hit me:

“By faith, I keep pressing on
By faith, hope is never gone
No matter what I’m walking through
All things are possible with you
By faith, on the rock I stand
Always, I will trust your plan
Every step I take along the way
I will walk by faith”

The next song played was Press On by Mandisa and this verse spoke to me:

“How many storms have I been through?
How many led me right to You?
You’re using the pain, the hardest days
For my good, my good
So what do I fear
God, You are with me
Guiding my steps today
Through the mountains, valleys, sun and rain
Lord, lead the way, lead the way”

The line “through the mountains, valleys, sun and rain” seemed so applicable physically to where I have been these past month… in the mountains literally, in the Valley literally, many days of sunshine and now today rain.

It reassured me God was in charge today….

We arrived at the MVS and walked in and the paper didn’t work to get my number. We were directed to go to the first window.  There I had to fill out an application of what I needed.  Next, they wanted to take Bryson’s photo. Bryson has inherited my eye speed… as I say “my brain is faster than the speed of light” and when there is a flash, my eyes are closed.  The first 3 times, his eyes were closed, the 4^th they were open but he had his lips in a pout, the 5^th try his eyes were open but his head was turned a bit… but finally the 6^th attempt we had success.  We then sat down to wait for the person to complete our application. 

The gentleman started reviewing the application and my paperwork and said “we can’t take this paper work we need original” my heart sank… not again it was the same thing I had experienced at the SS office.  I started asking him if all my other paperwork was right and I thought we were done and defeated, but then he said “oh we don’t need this because you are just getting an ID not a driver’s license.” Oh I started breathing again and he continued with the paperwork.  Then he stopped again and said “ you can’t use this if you want a travel ID” again my heart sank again, Lord, just get this completed and get me out of here. I asked “can we just get him an ID? “YES” and there you have it. I felt the presence of all of the prayer warriors when the gentleman told me the first time it won’t work… I was watching him and it was like he saw something more clearly… It was definitely a visual God moment to me.

We paid and got the paper receipt copy and headed out the door.  Victory, I felt a huge relief but I couldn’t totally embrace the moment, doubts started swirling… “what if DDD won’t take the paper copy?  What if this isn’t right?  I hate how satan tries to sabotage a victory… I want to enjoy the victory and I praise God for His ways, but the battle isn’t over yet. The first thing I did when I returned to the RV was submit Bryson’s AZ ID and other needed paperwork to DDD by email.  NOW I wait again…….

Life is a process and it involves stepping one by one through each layer… God showed me today more than the victory of Bryson’s ID, but I saw and I wept over my amazing village I have who stand with me.  I feel alone very often… the last month especially as I have been away from my friends and families but many a time just alone in this journey. God is faithful and I needed the reminder that I just need to reach out and ask and God will show me what all HE has provided for me.

I ask again for your prayers for the DDD application and interview and all the process ahead… and declare “I’m going to see a victory”!